As a writer, I tend to read a lot. The following is a list of my all-time favorite books,

in no particular order:



An Inquiry Into the Origin of Hens – Lao Tse


When the War Was Good – E. Hemingway


Hypochondriacs Live Longer – David Sedaris


Finnegan’s Wake and Bake – James Jones


Rich and Strange: The Biography of Howard Hughes – Anonymous


The Candy Licker – Schler Muhammed Rasool


The Candy Licker’s Daughter – Schler Muhammed Rasool


The Candy Licker’s Time Traveling Wife – Schler Muhammed Rasool


The Candy Licker’s Da Vinci Code… ‘In Bed’ – Schler Muhammed Rasool


Turning the Mind into an Alley – L. Rinpoche


Flaunt Your Buddhism, Girl!: A Girl’s Guide to Being a Single Buddhist in the Big City
SJ Parker


Sexual Aberrations of the Criminal Female – Marnie Connery, Ph.D


Iraq: What the Hell is Happening? – Cornell West


Iraq: What the Hell Happened? – Cornell West


My Caucasian – Andre Dubus III


Nothing’s Illuminated, Bitch – Harold Bloom


The Fifty Best of Everything Ever and Why: From Aardvark to Dyspepsia – Harold Bloom


Priapism Among the Haystacks – TS Lawrence


The Complete Geological Surveys of Andrei Tarkovsky 1952 –58 (Schocken Classics Series)


How Much Protein Does a Man Need? – Leo Tolstoy


How Not to Look Fat – Danica Lo


Who’s Your Fishmonger? – Niles Crane


Little Dieter Don’t Diet – Gunter Grass


Billary Slams Obamanation on the Obanomy & Other Flip–flops – JT Plouffe


You CAN Take It With You: I Took My Money Beyond the Grave and So Can You – Trask Carnegie


My Itamae: A Story of A Boy & His Imaginary Sushi Chef – Ozu Murakami


My Life As Art – Andy Warhol


My Life As Art – Art Garfunkel


My Life in Art – Paul Simon


Good at Life: The Story of Barack Obama – Charlie Kaufmann


Indestructible Teeth: The Living Spirituality of Orthodontist Richard Shenkman

Richard Shenkman, DMD


The Auras of Seals – JZ Coetzee


Cheese is the New Meat – Baron von Vanderkrass


“Hi baby girl. You are a precious treasure!” – Sunflower Concepcion


Electric Renaissance (In My Pants) – Medici Da Vinci


The Land Surveys of Henry David Thoreau 1851 –62 (Unabridged version, 2400 pp): Schocken Classics Series


Reading the Script: the Collected Prescriptions of William Carlos Williams, Organized by Drug Name (Schlocken Klassics, 4500 pp) – Professor Philip Windfcuker [submitted by M. Shadwell]


Suffocation – Knut Hamsun


The Hills of Tora Bora – Ernest Hemingway


Deep Shit: Philosophy and the Art of Sanitation – Charles Friedrich Pirsig


War and the Metamorphosis of the Idiot – Franz Tolstoevsky


The Tough Tears Series: Cry Tough, Sob Tough, Weep Tough, Wail Tough


For Colored Girls/ When they go over the rainbow/ and get the blues – by Cholo (author of The Vagina Decologues, House of Freedom, &  O Cry, O Solitude!)


For Colored Girls/ When the Rainbow is More than Enuff/ But they Can’t Figure Out How to eat Flan – Cholo


The Bedbugs of Shannara – Terrence Gilliam


The Uneditable – Samuel Beckett


The Coconut Shuckers – Jeb Steinbeck


The 101 Best Recipes For Preparing Bedbugs – Shel Rombauer & Bob Dylan (aka, Jack Frost) 


Krapp’s First Tape – Samuel Beckett


Cooking Without Looking: Harnessing the Power of the Force to Prepare the Finest Culinary Delights – Leia Childs


The Best American Poetry of 2011 (or, Some of the Worst Poetry of All Time) – eds. Philip Windfcuker & Rebecca Socialclimer


No Entrance: Race Relations in 1960s Mississippi – John Paul Sartre


The Analytics – Google


Man’s Search for Herring – Wheelis Frankl


America’s 50 Best States – Roscoe Wilderness


Chinchillas in the Mist – Everett Goodall


History— Whose Fault Is It? (Yahweh Press) – Jason Bentsman


The Collected Texts, SMS Messages, and Tweets of Alexander Pushkin  


French Grammar The Hard Way – Language Learning for Sadomasochists Series (Boot to the Groin Press)


Are Snakes Necessary? – Bismark von Preminger


That Side of Paradise – Francis Fitzcarraldo


Love in the Time of BLAH – Gabrielle Garcia Copeland


The Wisdom of the East (of Harlem) – Flyguy Slade


The Divided MILF – JT Lancaster, Sex Therapist


Humid, All Too Humid – Allen Nietzsche


The James Brown Bible (JBB) (Def Jam Publishing)
The definitive translation of the Christian Bible as told by the Godfather of Soul


Treating Feline Psychogenic Alopecia (FPA) – Sheldon Alverschwartz, PCP


The Complete Dungeons & Dragons Compendium To Spirituality – Ken Wilber


Healing at the Edge of Calm – Himhart Holibrook


No Alain Delon: The Life of Jason Bentsman (Scribners)
Biography explaining how I’m inferior to Alain Delon in virtually every way. (IE: ‘JB was born in Minsk, Belarus. Of course, at that time, and still today, Minsk is a backwater compared to Lyon, the vibrant, bustling, and cultural mecca that gave birth to Alain Delon— thespian, artist, philosopher, lover, humanitarian extraordinaire.’)


When To Start Twerking: A Primer – Milarepa Cyrus


Dealing With Excitable Pigs – Grandor Amberson


The Way of All Floozies – Depardieu Butler


What Plants Talk About When They Talk About Running – Flystrap Harukami


The Way We Are: Poems April 3, 2003 – April 4, 2003 (3rd Edition)


Meditation for Sleazy People – Guruji Michael Powers


Life With Limits: How To Be Given Every Advantage and Still Fail Miserably – Charles Cameron Baliol, Esq.


Nietzsche’s Mustache: An Autobiography – Nietzsche’s Mustache


Mariposa: The Pink Butterfly (Take Me To Paradise) – Anonymous


Parks Without Bathrooms – Hemingway Chaplin


On Becoming A Pervert – Carl Dodgers





And here are some of my favorite movies…


From the Producers of Girls Gone Wild: Food Gone Bad


Flipper & Lassie: Tag-team Madness


Harold and Kumar No More Go A Roving


Diarrhea of a Country Priest – Robert Bresson


The Troi Colors Trilogy – Kieslowski Kandinsky

I Am Bi-curious, Yellow

I Am Horny, Rouge

I Am Very Hungover, Don’t Talk To Me, Puce


Children of the Opposite Sex – Marcel Ophuls


Days of Indigestion – Kar Wong Wei


Chinchillas in the Mist (documentary based on the bestselling book by Everett Goodall)


Last Tango in Boise, Idaho – Wayne Berlescucci


The Leaves Have Ears – Fairbanks Sirk


Whose Pants Are These? (documentary) – Errol Apted


The Red Fire Hydrant (documentary) – Errol Apted


Leonard Cohen: The Non–existent Years
Documentary chronicling the life of Leonard Cohen from the late Middle Ages through the early Renaissance in Western Europe


Deuce Bigalow: Ontological Gigolo


Stalker Nostalgia – Andrey Jerkovsky




And, for good measure, several of my very favorite songs…


Don’t Bogart the Pussy – Tone-Déf


I Want to Put My Penis Inside Your Vagina, Woman – Martin Ricky


Wholesome Romance – Lady GooGoo


You Look Just Like My Anima, Baby – Young Adler


I Kissed My Grandma (And I Liked It) – aka, Taste of Geriatric – Katy Perry


Slather It – the new hit single from Devo


Anal Surprise – Miles Davis


My Fin-De-Siècle Mama – Buddy Robespierre


Menstruation Vacation – Kraftwerk


In A Horizontal Way – Davis Coltrane


You Gotta Smoke Somethin’ – Bob Dyland


The Best of the Best of the Best of Berlin (aka, Take My Breath Away / Metro)


I Shat My Pants (And I Liked It) – Katy Perry


Shat My Pants Again – Katy Perry


Carefully Planned And Executed Whisper – Michael George 

To Occasionally See More Pieces Like This In Your FB Newsfeed  



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